Overwhelmed

I feel a bit beat down by the holiday this year

I'm way behind

work has been better

Miss M's schedule with Winterguard is really hectic

I had some minor surgery (that I'm recovered from -- but still)

and I'm not feeling even a little bit in the holiday spirit.

Life is complicated.

and too busy

and most nights -- I wish I could just sleep all the way though

I'm taking her to my parents on the 18th -- and it'll be good for both of us -- I'm feeling really really really overwhelmed.

I love having her here -- but gosh

sometimes it's just hard to always be "on"

Black Friday Posse

My brother and sister in law took Miss M and Miss J shopping for black friday -- this is the result

Sick

We're both home sick today

that happens sometimes -- I'm recovering from my surgery -- and the kiddo? She's got a terrible cold.

Being a first time Mom -- I don't know much about what the kiddo wants -- so I give her what I want instead.

To be left mostly alone -- followed by periods of being forced to eat or drink something -- I think I have everything I need to make some chicken soup (which she will hate -- she likes beef -- but I'm not going to the store for beef)

We had a conversation once about sick food -- she asked me what Americans eat -- I told her about chicken soup

I asked her what Mongolian's eat -- she said "black soup" -- which seems to be just horse meat, water, garlic and salt.

I'm fresh out of horse.

Being a Mongolian kid -- I think she responds well to the "let her stay in her cave and bully her into eating things approach" -- I think it matches her Mom's approach to things

God help me if I had someone who wanted pampering -- I don't think I'm that sort of Mom.

So our house will be quiet today -- this isn't all sunshine and puppies --sometimes it's coughing, and runny noses and kleenex.

You shouldn't blog stoned

HA! -- THAT got your attention.

I'm pretty out of it -- I had to have some girl surgery this week (or surbery as I just typed) and did that this morning -- the best friend in the world Amy took me and is hanging out with me as I come back to my senses.

I needed to explain what was happening to Miss M last week.

I started off by saying that I needed to have some very minor surgery -- that they wouldn't cut me and I would only need to miss one maybe two days of work.

I started to draw a triangle with some balls on two of points and an opening at the bottom --

"this is a uterus"

She looked at me with teenage eyes

"I know what it is"

Sometimes I forget that she's not stupid -- she's just got a language barrier

She heard me out -- and asked if it would hurt -- I told her about as much as the worst period you've ever had.

She nodded and moved on.

So I had it this morning -- and other than feeling pretty out of it (I spent about 5 minutes trying to understand a cartoon sent to me by a friend -- it had 2 praying mantises having tea -- the first one said, "My husband keeps disagreeing with me" and the second one said, "Try and antacid, dear")

but otherwise I have every reason to think that I am going to have an outstanding outcome.

I expect Emma will fus over me tonight -- and you know what -- I think I'm going to let her.

ow.

Miss M made the team!

Miss M got word on Friday that she's on the Winter Guard team -- which is like color guard -- but different in some way she can't quite explain

doesn't matter

She found something she wanted to do

signed up for it

and did it

without any of her friends doing it with her

I am so proud of her!!!!!!

In other news -- it's clear that she is now thinking in English instead of Mongolian

She will say a sentance

and then another

and her brain will go back and correct the first sentance and she'll correct herself.

I remember this from my time studying abroad (is Mexico really abroad? -- nevermind)

There's a backslide that happens with your language when your brain shifts into thinking in the new language -- you slow down and the brain forms those new paths

but it's a brilliant moment

THINKING IN ENGLISH!!!

Story writing

Miss M and I Had fun last night with homework.

nope

Not Chemistry

ENGLISH!

She had to write a story -- and she chose to write a scary story.

I won't put the details of it here -- but let's just say it has a twist

my favorite part was when she referenced a list of word's she looked up in advance -- all words for different kinds of laughing.

guffaw
giggle
cackle
snicker

I had to demonstrate each of them for her -- which gave us both giggle fits.

Her story shows her growth in the language

later on -- she was working on something else and I was watching Glee -- Sue Syvestree was laughing evilly

and I heard a voice from M's room

"Is that a cackle?"

Good Girl

She's a sponge

I am Thankful for Passive-Aggressive Emails

The following was in my inbox a few days ago:


Hi Guys,

The exchange students are supposed to have a Thanksgiving potluck and game night on Nov. 20. The are scheduled to host it, but I just found out that they are not hosting because they "have other plans". I'm wondering if you guys still want to have a get together, and if so, is there some place north where we can have it so it's closer for more people? would like to get together with the other students.

If you guys think it's too short of notice, or too close to Thanksgiving, or that we should just wait, no problem. Just wanted to get something in the works if we want to get together.

Happy Friday!

Ok the Backstory -- the Mom writing this hosted the Halloween party (we'll call her CAROL) -- you remember -- we're the only ones who showed up......

apparently the Joneses were planning to come as they live down the street from Carol -- but they called right at the last minute to say they weren't going to come because they "don't do Halloween"

Carol was pissed -- because they were originally hosting this party together and now there's some sort of falling out

plus -- they're all hyper religious -- so the "We don't do Halloween" is sort of a 'more-born-again-than-thou' slap in the face.

I didn't mention to Carol that I had a FB conversation with Mrs Jones early on that same day and knew for hours and hours that they weren't going

why throw gasoline on the fire.

so -- I LOVE LOVE LOVE this email -- that was sent via our group to God and Everybody as my mom would say -- the 'quotemarks of derision" are awesome.

I can't believe I haven't been an exchange mom before - this is better than General Hospital.

pass the popcorn......

Halloween

I was hoping to have some photos to post -- but I took most of the photos with Miss J's camera -- and she hasn't posted photos yet.

It was an exchange student event night -- and I felt obligated to take Miss M -- since the old Mom for Miss J never takes her anywhere -- I arranged to pick up Miss J.

Miss M went as a bunny -- I made her add jeans to her super short pink dress because she tends to get so cold -- and when we picked up Vampire Miss J she was wearing one of those teen-slutty short costume skirts -- we had to vow not to post any full photos of her on FB so her Mom didn't freak out.

We might be slow learners
but we learn

We headed out for the drive to the other exchange student house -- close to 40 miles away -- complete with pot luck food -- home baked cookies and costumes (them -- not me -- Alice is retired)

The girls are continually surprised at how long we have to drive to get just about anywhere -- there where a lot of "when will we get theres"

We were the first to arrive

Miss M lamented "We are always first"

"I know sweetie -- I'll try to work on that"

The party was at the home of Miss W from China -- she was excited that someone had arrived -- the girls had fun handing out candy to the little ones as we waited for more guest to arrive.

The Coordinator was allegedly bringing 5 kids -- but by 7pm (2 hours into the event) it became clear that we WERE the party

Thank God we went -- how horrible for Miss W if no one came to her party

Finally -- it got dark enough -- and we all headed out to trick or treat -- the neighborhood went all out -- haunted houses -- goblins -- pumpkins -- even a chainsaw wielding maniac.

There were screams -- and laughs -- and the girls (who originally thought this would be childish and a drag) -- had an amazing American experience

sort of a 1970's Halloween experience -- that I haven't seen in decades.

Next up -- trouble in Exchange Parent Land (see you next blog)

All Roads Lead to Nascar -- again

sigh

How much do I hate Nascar weekends

(previous post from April)

Emma and I tried to go to Walmart last Thursday -- and gave up -- you couldn't even get through the parking lot.

What was I thinking -- WALMART???? on NASCAR WEEKEND?

MADNESS!

So we're off to go shopping and see a movie with my cool friend Amy (she's that cool Aunt that every girl loves -- Miss M's psyched to see her) -- and

I'm ashamed to say it

buy a space heater

because we're cold

Miss M's room is freezing -- it's about 6 or 7 degrees colder than the rest of my cold apartment -- something we never seem to be able to rectify... time to put in another work order.

******************

oh -- on the Miss J front -- she's moved to her new family -- well sort of -- the new family had a trip planned for this week -- so she's staying with friends of the new family

it's all so fucked up.

I feel very bad for her -- and I'm helpless to do a darn thing

Clarification on Miss J

I've received a few questions on this

Miss J has a new home

but so far -- they haven't bothered to tell her:

when she is moving
does she have siblings
Is there a Mom and a Dad -- or just a Mom

just that she will stay in the same school.

so she's struggling with this

it's frustrating -- but I'm also keenly aware

that it's not my business.

sigh

I need to vent

So -- the exchange student thing has been a HUGE blessing.

but I have to tell you -- the people who are running the program? Not always very forthright with information -- and willing to do whatever it takes to get what they want.

which seems like a good thing? right?

Not when the corners you cut end up hurting people:

Exhibit A: I was supposed to have Miss M for 5 months.....but I discovered, that she had no idea that this was the case. When family #2 pulled out -- I had to decide if I wanted them to continue to try to find her a new home (which might or might not have been at the same school) or if I wanted to make double the commitment I signed up for.

How do you tell a child that she's going to a new Mom -- and NOT make it feel like it's because you didn't want her?

Exhibit B: Miss J (the BFF) has been living with a single Mom who works nights. I got a message last week from the agency rep saying the 'have to find Miss J a new home -- and do I know someone?'

I asked why

they said "apparently Miss J's been staying home alone 3 or 4 nights a week"

I said, "yeah -- I thought you knew that"

they said, "we thought someone was staying with her or she was staying with you" (bullshit)

I said, "nope -- she stays here one or two nights a month -- tops"

So -- we started the search for a new family -- I love this kid -- she needs to stay here!

so - why do I say "bullshit"?

I asked a few weeks ago if I could go on a business trip and have my parents stay overnight with Miss M....they said, "yes, -- but they would need to be background checked"

so where was the background check on the person who was allegedly staying with Miss J?

So -- Poor Host Mom and Host Sister -- losing their exchange student who they love (they should have been told they couldn't host in the first place)

Poor Miss J -- having to leave her family -- and form a new one (she is staying at the same school)

and shame on the agency reps

We're only 2 months in -- what else is going to come to light?

what a load of crap.

The Airshow is coming

The Airshow is this weekend -- yes -- Halloween weekend.

and before you think -- really, Gina? -- you don't seem to be the airshow type.

I'm not.

The Airshow is a royal pain in the ass.

The MFing Blue Angels have been flying over the DC all week -- blocking traffic which makes my 2 mile commute a 16 mile commute around the closed roads -- oh -- at 20 mph.

They're so loud you have to stop talking on the phone -- and they pass over my office over and over again.

Miss M and Dad are going tomorrow.

they'll have fun.

I was hoping to go with Mom for a Pedi -- but she's declared she "doesn't need one"

doesn't NEED one?

no one NEEDS a pedi.

sigh

it's like she was raised by wolves.

(Love you Mom!)

There's the exchange student halloween party on Sunday -- Miss M is going as a bunny in a dress she already owned and some bunny ears that I got at the sample sale.

Used clothes were NOT considered.

My costume was made out of duct tape -- and I'm pretty damned proud of it -- particularly my duct tape ruffle!

sorry for the blurry photo -- best I could do with the phone of myself -- I wore it all day for the party -- it was fun -- the associates loved it

Happy Halloween!!!!

(PS - NO -- that is not my hair -- that's a horrible drag-queen doll-hair wig -- Thank God I'm a brunette!!!)

Mum's the word

Texas is weird

They have this Mum thing for Homecoming

I've made one for Em -- shhhhhhhh it's a surprise

I can't believe it

Miss M is totally using contractions!

It's a banner day!

I didn't think this day would ever come

I missed you apostraphe!!!!!!

Shock and Horror

We're headed to CCA today

The Kiddo needs a costume for Halloween and I have some ideas

I told her we would go to CCA to buy some 'used clothes'

She looked at me as if I had offered to smear dung in her hair

"I could not do that"

"Sure you can -- everyone does it -- I've bought many things there"

"USED clothes????"

"Yup -- it's halloween"

"Nooooooo"

"It'll be fun - you'll see"

This should be interesting

Denied

We didn't get the 2nd student

and we're not going to the school district won't admit any more students

so it's just the 2 of us.

and it'll be fine.

***********************

Miss M is getting a little bit recalcitrant -- right on schedule -- as predicted by the program

I'll get her back on track with her chores

She has slept round the clock today -- and it's hard to tell if it's depression or teen sleeping.

I guess one night is "teen sleeping" and several night is depression.

We'll see

it's hard to be away from your life for so long

The Leap

So we've been reviewing profiles of other students

and I've gone back and forth on adding another student

there are good reasons to do it.

there are good reasons not to do it.

but it comes down to -- "Am I on this adventure or am I not?"

I hate that I have been so risk-adverse for so much of my life.
I love the idea that I've been brave enough to do this

it's a huge blessing

and I know that stepping in to this again will also be a blessing

even if it's horrible
even if she's disruptive
or doesn't connect with us

this too will be a rich experience I can add to my life experiences.

This year will be one of the years that I will revisit over and over again in the future -- in my old age -- these are the children that will remember me.

or at least some of the children who will remember me.

So -- we liked the profile of a girl from Germany -- but she was gone by the time I got off the pot and made a decision.

So today - -they sent us 2 profiles of girls from Italy.

And we chose Camilla.

Camilla will be our new daughter
and our new sister

God willing

Birthday Plans

I'm excited for Miss M's birthday!

It's tomorrow --but I think her family is going to Skype with her today (at least I hope so) for her Mongolian birthday (due to the time difference)

and we'll be going out for dinner tomorrow night for her American birthday

and there'll be an outing next Saturday with friends.

16 is a big deal here
18 is the big birthday in Mongolia

I think this is a happy medium.
**************


I had mentioned to the program's AC that Em would like a sister -- and that I was not opposed to this --

to me this is a once in a lifetime experience -- what difference does it make if I add one more -- and it might enrich the experience for all 3 of us.

The AC sent me an email -- she has someone who's coming out in January -- do we want to see her profile.

Yes

I came home to talk to Miss M -- she was initially very excited -- but we talked about it -- and agreed that this is going to take a family decision
.
we're going to make a Pro Con list -- review the profile and make a decision.

I loved Em's comment

"We would need a lot more rules"

Rain

It started to rain

Em ran into the room

"It's raining!"

We had to go out on the patio to watch the rain

It was pelting down so hard the drops where bouncing back up into the air as they hit the grass.

Em stood on a chair to reach one hand out into the rain


"want to go out in it?"

she looked at me in shock

"really"

"Come on", I replied -- "Let's do it"

We were soaked in seconds

she announced that she wanted to see the pool and reached her arm out to grab my hand so we could run together through the heavy rain

I was shocked
and pleased
and touched

We ran laughing -- and looked at the pool -- wishing we had cameras that would have been ruined by the downpour

The rain was painfully sideways on the run back -- we were laughing and gasping as the rain was inhaled into our lungs

-- it was a beautiful moment

We were family/friends/sisters all at once

strange encounter

I bumped into my Gynecologist at TJ Maxx

She was shopping in the home goods section and at first I couldn't place her -- I actually went down an aisle she was in -- wracking my brain to try to place her.

She was very very familiar

but I had no idea where I had seen her before

When it hit me it was very strange

Like running into a former teacher at a bar

She looked like she was having fun -- browsing -- I said hello (she said hello back in an absent way that told me she had no idea who I was) and we went about our Saturday

It was surreal -- like coming home and finding the dog washing the dishes.

Fake Sick or Home Sick?

Miss M stayed home today

She woke up complaining that her eyes hurt -- I the she wanted me to tell her to stay home

I didn't bite

I hoped she would suck it up and go to school

eventually she asked to stay home -- and I allowed it

after assurances that there are no tests to be missed and knowing that homework was done

she slept most of the day

I wonder if she's finally feeling homesick

Mom would have been nice when she feels sick

I'm not mom.

Send in the Clones

I am a terrible American

I have kept Miss M from the most essential of American experiences

I have kept her from

McDonalds

What a horrible oversight

Sunday --we went to the movies and saw Despicable Me in 3D-- they have 3D in Mongolia -- but it's the kind with the red and blue glasses -- I think Em liked it -- but she would have rather seen a slasher flick or Step Up 3D -- maybe next time.

She took pity on me -- she knew I wanted to see this one

So -- afterwards -- I offered Mexican or McDonalds

2 guesses which one she chose -- first guess doesn't count

She ordered a Quarter Pounder -- she wanted to order and pay for it herself -- We took about 15 pictures -- ordering it -- the box, the soda, the burger (before, during and after)

She kept asking me about the clone --

I had no idea what she meant

finally --I figure it out

O-W-N is own

so if you add a cl to that -you get "clone" (very logical)

English is weird

A recent dream

I fell asleep on a friend's couch -- and had the following dream

I had to go back to the office -- which for some reason was both my current office and a hospital.

I got into the parking lot and was irritated that the security guard was nowhere to be found.

I got out of my car and headed to the main building -- which involved climbing down a steep ravine and fording a small stream before heading up the cliff face on the other side

As I was climbing I noticed that a burro pulling a cart was working his way down the parking lot side of the ravine -- the cart held a woman and many packages -- and her husband walked along side -- another man lead the burro. They were all wearing complicated disguises -- which included beards and fake beauty marks and big straw hats.

As they reached the bottom of the ravine they took off their hats and threw them like boomerangs to man in a roach coach who caught them with ease and put them on the racks with all the other hats -- and I realize that this is a people smuggling operation and they are 'coyotes'.

I continue up the hill and reach above my head to open this old white wooden door -- I'm pissed when I discover the door isn't locked (seriously -- what sort of security team do we HAVE anyway!) and I lift my leather backpack (which I'm pretty sure the ex got in the divorce) over my head and shove it just inside the door where I can find it tomorrow.

I woke up -- very irritated at security.

Study Aids

School has just been a bitch

and I feel for her

Foreign language classes don't prepare you to analyze literature and discuss the political reasons for various events in US History

Vocabulary is the ENEMY

We're going to beat this -- one Latin or Greek root word at a time.

I see flashcards in our future

Adventures

The girls got up early -- about 8:30 -- now that they're on school schedules -- it feels like sleeping in.

At 10:30 -- they were eating sandwiches -- I scolded a bit - "We're going to KoMart for LUNCH"

"When" asked Em

"Noon"

"I can eat again"

Shit -- teenagers -- it's almost a little disgusting.

My Mom assures me that at this age they're either eating all the time - or nothing at all --

So Let's see -- at this point in the day Em has eaten: A banana, a small orange, some left over popcorn, two swiss roll cakes and a roast beef sandwich.

We pack up and head out to pick up Amy in Irving

Miss M and Miss J think that everything here is very far -- when I declare that Amy lives only 27 miles away -- they look at me like I'm insane.

We picked up Amy and headed to KoMart

KoMart is this big Korean grocery store where you can buy anything at the grocery store, buy electronics, shoes and sit down and have lunch.

I picked up a hand basket that was almost instantly full of all the things that Miss J misses from home -- Miss M found her beloved "Choco-pies" and was blissful

I was asked, "When will we come again?" -

"Not for quite some time -- it's far"

and 2 more choco pie boxes were in my basket (now replaced with a cart)

We had a lovely Korean-Korean food lunch -- where I was grateful that I had the "if its orange it's hot" guideline -- and headed to the next adventure.

The Mall

We went to Southlake -- one of those Malls that looks like a town -- but is really just a big shopping mall and set the girls loose with the instructions, "do not leave the boundaries of the map (Yes -- this mall has a MAP) and meet us at THIS starbucks at 5"

They were stunned and pleased with the unexpected freedom -- and ran off in the direction of Victoria's Secret

Amy and I wandered around looking at things -- ate some Toll House Cookies and found ourselves at Barnes and Noble

At 4:45 -- I got a call from Miss J -- wanting to know if I had said 5 or 6 ("Five" I assured her) -- amazing how 2 1/2 hours seemed decadent -- now it was too short.

They came back with Jamba Juice (Now the count includes another orange, a large Korean lunch of what I think was Kimchi soup, a choco-pie and a jamba juice)

We had chili for dinner -- and Miss M finally declared herself full -- and rounded off the evening watching a TIVOed So You Think You Can Dance

I think I might be the fun-mom

who would have thought....

What a week!

Mom and Dad were a God-send -- they came and hung out with Miss M all week while I was at the conference that never ended

I knew it would be demanding on my time -- but I didn't expect that I would be there from 6am to 10pm every day.

I missed Miss M

and I think she missed me too.

She had a great time with Mom and Dad -- and now -- we're starting our holiday weekend.

Miss J has joined us again this weekend and they're making personalized Tshirts -- and giggling

like you do

Tomorrow we're going to go to KoMart to see if their Korean food is Korean and maybe

brace yourself

to the mall.

Thank God Amy's going with us -- it'll save my sanity......Miss M is DYING to go to Victoria's Secret

a bonding

I'm going to be insanely busy this week

Mom and Dad came in to hang out with Em -- otherwise she would have had a week entirely alone -- not good

I sent the three of them off to Home Depot for new flowers -- and they found some lunch and introduced Em to Mexican food (which she loved!)

The alone time did the trick -- and her family just got a bit bigger

very nice

The new flowers are amazing looking -- and I'm off to a week of meetings -- and coming home to sleep 5 hours and do it again and again

nifty

exhausted

Mom and Dad are here -- we're hanging out this weekend and they'll be here for Em while I'm at the conference for work this week.

I'm staying at the house -- but will be spending so many hours driving back and forth to the conference that it will be as if no one was here without them

I'm so grateful they could do this

If we were further along she might have been able to hang out with friends

Em slept in -- I got up early and did some chores -- went to the store and M & D got here in time for lunch -- we ran errands and finally got Em a phone

finally

We had a fun venture to Sam Moon -- shopping paradise where I got a Betty Boop handbag and Em got a cute new watch

dullsville for my 3 readers I know

but some days will be dull
routine

this is life

some days we get up
eat some food
do some laundry
spend some money
go home
eat again

and sleep

I guess that describes most days

and Thank God most days are like that -- adventure is best in small doses.

A nice visit

Curt came over to have dinner with us and meet Em.

We hung out -- worked on some Algebra II -- ate dinner.

She gave him a gift -- it's a keychain with a symbol on it -- it's supposed to be good for his ankles and improve his mettle

He put it right on his key ring

He gave me a nice boost of confidence that I'm on the right track with somethings and need to stay the course

and then we packed him off.

Em wants me to teach her how to make spaghetti -- but I wonder if she means the kind that I get out of a jar - or the homemade kind that I make.

She loved the breadsticks I made -- which came out of a tube (pizza dough I cut in strips and sprinkled with a tiny bit of salt.

I learned my Mongolian -- and we had fun trying to gross each other out with different foods -- a good time was had by all.

BTW -- I have her agreement to try crawdads when they are in season -- there will be photos of that!

Good Day (mostly because we've left the homework for another night!)

Roadblocks

I keep reminding myself that the early days will be the hardest.

School is very frustrating for Em -- it's such a new world -- and nothing makes that much sense.

US History remains the worst. I am encouraging her to stick it out -- because it's a required class. She cannot drop this class -- and she just needs to hang in there. I think her instinct is to give up because she spends an hour in there not understanding one single word.

Algebra -- she's done this before -- I think she just needs to work out the terms -- once she figures out what the Mongolian terms are for domain and range I think math will go ok...

German -- she seems to think this isn't that big of a deal. I'm going to force her to practice vocabulary just so she can say the words outloud.

English -- we'll see. She had to write a short essay today. Her teacher encouraged her to write it in Mongolian and translate it into English....which frankly I think is crappy advice -- I think that part of this experience is to start to learn to THINK in English and STOP translating. But hey -- I'm not the teacher -- and she may not be at that stage quite yet.

Chemistry -- so far -- no homework -- this is the teacher she thinks will be MEAN.

Art and Dance -- no information so far about those classes --

I think she's pretty discouraged -- and I'm a little discouraged too. I'm worried that I won't be able to support her the way I need to.

we're going to have these ups and downs -- I know that.

sigh

I know that.

US History sucks

She's got a mumbler in this class

and on top of it -- the reading for the class is very difficult.

He sent her home with a long essay on the Homestead Act that clearly was written by someone with a huge Thesaurus.

and this class is required.

****************
On a separate note -- I am also doing poorly with Mongolian == surguul is the word for school -- and there's this growly g sound that I a cannot make and requires one to make sounds you've never even heard.

Mongolian is very very hard.

American Name

Miss M has chosen an American name!

Her Mongolian name is very difficult for Americans to say -- and she has decided that she is now just Em or Emily.

This will make it easier for her at school with her teachers and her classmates -- and it's a big step up for her to assimilate.

Also - implementation of the rules is today -- she's monitoring her internet time and it breaking her one hour up into smaller pieces -- very smart.

She's highly motivated to get that internet time so I think that she will join the club and do what she has to do to get that Internet time back

Whatever it takes to get her with the program.

I even have her out watching TV with me tonight -- again -- a big victory -- she's not hiding away!!!!

School went OK today -- she found all her classes and she got her new schedule -- and she has declared (most) of her teachers to be nice. We'll see how it goes when they are actually giving her assignments.

So far

no books

no homework

maybe tomrrow.

Em and I are hanging out -- and I am very

very

very

happy.

BTW -- learning the Mongolian words is going to be very very hard! I cannot write them phoenetically -- as there are sounds that do not exist in English -- but it's making us laugh and laugh and laugh

G

Big improvement!

Ok -- as you'll remember -- I failed to follow the advice of the exchange student people and discuss rules from day one

but I've made a recovery!!!!

Oh -- wait! -- here's some funniness from this morning first...

I made a huge breakfast for the managers at work today -- Breakfast burritos for all -- 3# of bacon -- 2 dozen eggs -- and 2 dozen homemade muffins

I'm a nice HR manager sometimes....

I set off the smoke alarm and asked Miss M to open the doors to vent out the smoke. I told her to get some eggs and bacon and (I kid you not)

she had 9 slices of bacon

I made her put some back -- Jeez - that kid can EAT!

While we were sitting there we noticed a HUGE spider on the rug -- about the side of a coaster

DANG -- never a man around when you need him - after some girly squealing (her) and the untimely death of the spider via flip flop (I think it was only stunned) -- I chucked it in the yard

I'm never sleeping again-- maybe I'll remarry -- just for THAT!

**********************

After dinner -- we sat down with some paper-- we each wrote out the rules as we decided them.

Curfew
Dating
School work
School activities

but one tough one remained -- INTERNET

She learned a new word today - NEGOTIATE

I offered 1 hour of social internet per day

But we settled on 2 -- IF -- she has all her homework done - AND she joins a social club at school

DEAL!

We even shook on it.

I'm very pleased -- and feel like we have a new start!

PS
We added one rule at the end that she loved -- EVERY DAY - I must learn one Mongolian word -- and she may test me on them

I'm very excited -- SCHOOL STARTS TOMORROW!!!!

Sleepover -- Night 2

Miss J stayed again

The remake of Fame was not enough to keep either of them engaged tonight.

Miss J conked out early and Miss was not far behind her.

They had a blast at the pool today

Miss M needs to learn to swim -- but there's time for that.

This morning -- they got up at a reasonable hour and pretended to like the blueberry pancake I made --

We headed off for some school supply shopping. Miss M go a book bag at Target and asked where the mirror was......

:)

adorable

She instead made Miss J put it on so she could decide if it was cool enough.

Ok -- on a serious note

I fucked up.

I felt bad about laying down the rules and it was a mistake. She is spending too much time isolated in her room -- she's even shyer than I am -- and I'm going to have to FORCE her to socialized.

Being anti-social is a reason for the AC to intervene and put them on probation......we can't have that. Big Brother must be kept at bay.

We talked today

Me: Vacation ends tomorrow
Her: Yes -- last day
Me: Tomorrow we will sit down and go over the school time rules- study time -- internet time

She seemed to expect this

We also talked about spending more time with me -- even if it is watching US TV -- HEARING English will help her.

We WILL make this work.

Rock Paper Scissors

When I woke up today -- there was no sign of life

I could tell that they were up late -- 1/2 the crate of clementine oranges was gone.

I was starving -- and had planned on pancakes -- but as the hours ticked away -- I gave up on that.

I fried up some bacon and ate my share leaving some for the girls. Finally I wrote a note for the girls and put it on the TV

I got my haircut -- and went to the store -- and made my friend Jill's crockpot pulled pork recipe (it's in the crock pot) for tomorrow night

and they slept on and on

Finally -- a sign of life!

they emerged -- groggy -- crabby -- hungry

Miss M just waved at Miss J and I and went directly into the bathroom -- showered and emerged cleaner but no less groggy.

I kept my distance.

Today -- I asked Miss M if she wants Miss J to stay another night -- she said "Yes!"

So I said -- "good -- you should ask her" -- She said, "No, YOU ask her" I said -- do you want to do 'rock paper scissors?'

apparently they also have this in Mongolia -- only I can't pronounce it (more giggles at my attempt)

I won

(Ha!)

The jury is still out -- the shy Miss M has not yet asked....stay tuned...

Sleepover

I feel bad for Miss M and Miss J -- I drug them all over town after we picked up Miss J -- we had to get movies and junk at the store.

Pizza
Chile and Lime chips
Popcorn
Skittles
Starburst
Mango sorbet
soda

they're very quiet
and very polite

but they have something important in common

they are strangers in a strange land.

I wish I were hosting 2 students -- having someone to hang out with would be nice for Miss M -- I told her today that some kids still need families -- she said she could share her room

She's lonely

I can't wait for school to start

Balanced

Crappy horrible awful day at work

Total beating

But then I came home to my lonely girl -- happy to see me -- and hungry (as always!)

I made grilled chicken salad and mango for dessert

Miss M being in the house is making me healthier-- I am making lunch each day and my house is filled with fruit!

Miss M's English is growing daily -- which is awesome to see (uh hear) -- today she was describing photos of her family and teaching me words in Mongolian -- She laughs at my pronunciation -- I must sound very funny

Ok -- short post today -- tomorrow is the much anticipated sleepover

pray for me!

Workaholic

I feel like my work life is taking over

and it's not my imagination

really

its not

I was at work for 13 hours today

It will get better -- I'm just a little over committed right now at work

Home is going well

Miss M had an awesome day --the girls had a great time -- and can't wait for Friday's sleepover

Miss M's friend (Miss J) is in a bind.

Her exchange program put her in the wrong school -- and there's no bus service

none

and her host mom just got word that there's no chance she will get into that school

That's a disaster

Her host Mom is a single mom who works nights -- she can't drive her to school each day and pick her up.

I am so damn lucky

We're home -- and bofh of us are tired -- but it was a good day

Shit Mom

Today was my first day back to work -- and I feel bad that she just got here and I abandoned her.

Ok -- Ok -- not abandoned-- I mean -- I spent tons of time by myself at that age -- but she hasn't had any time to make friends yet.

I gave her all my numbers and instructions on how to call if there's a fire....and left her to her own devices

Work was insane

hardly a minute to think about Miss M

I got home and she was fine

no fire

also -- the chicken I hoped to make for dinner was still frozen

shit

Off to Sonny Bryan's

She claims to like BBQ -- we'll see if she ever asks for it again (that will be the test)

However, I have worked to correct my shit Mom status

Tomorrow -- she will be picked up by one of the other exchange student's mom -- and Friday

drumroll

there will be

a

sleepover

here

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I haven't planned a sleepover since the 80's -- think I should buy a bunch of blue eyeshadow

you can never have too much blue eyeshadow.

New Student Tour

(So there's a part of me that feels some sort of need to apologize for posting over and over in one day -- but then again A) the 3 people who read this don't much care and B) -- this is a very very newsy time -- it'll taper off I'm sure)

Tonight there was a new student tour -- really designed for the Freshman class -- (there are 550 Freshman at this school) but open to anyone who's new this year. There were about 20 Sophmores and Juniors (this school is in it's second year -- so no seniors there yet)

When we got there it was mayhem

Drum team was drumming away and the drill team was cheering with frozen smiles on their faces as we came in

We were greeted by volunteers who directed us to go stand in a line beginning with our last name to get a badge that would identify the student

We stood forever in a line to be told we were in the wrong line and Juniors were at the end (an inside secret -- as this was not marked in any way)

Students went one direction -- parents the other. Miss M looked dismayed -- but with a little push and a "I'll meet you RIGHT HERE at 9" convinced her. I know that deer in the headlights look will go away -- and I'm so glad she got to be here with 500 kids before she meets the 1500 others (gulp!)

I can't tell you much about what her time was like -- she came back dazed -- overwhelmed and shellshocked. I'm not sure she will regain the power of speech tonight

I went with the parents where we had a presentation from one of the vice principals who over explained some things -- but underexplained others -- (If you're student is tardy 4 - 6 times he will get ECO but if it's more than 9 it will be ISS)

WTF?

Can't you just say "detention" and "In school suspension" --

insane

So -- here's what I've learned

Same: Assistant Principals -- bad jokes -- sort of a jerk
Different: Parents are intensely involved in their kids -- or completely negligent -- not quite sure where I'll fall in -- somewhere between I guess

Same: Kids haven't changed -- some are cool -- some are assholes
Different: Dress Codes, Cell phones, coffee bars, restaurants in school, no lockers, each students gets a computer, no books to carry back and forth (just some books to keep at home), grades posted online, no letter grades, security precautions to enter the school, strict attendance policies, way more homework, etc etc etc

I am out of my league

and not in the way I thought I would be.

So far I can do the home stuff -- feed, water, care for the student -- give her love and support

but I feel sort of bad sending her off to their space-station they call a highschool when my reference for all of this seems like a 1967 Chevy.

I guess Miss M's not the only one shell shocked.

Registration and a mostly fruitless search

I have to say that our school counselor is the best -- sweet -- patient -- kind -- and seems to really understand that we have NO IDEA WHAT WE ARE DOING

Miss M and I got out of the house eventually -- I'm not quite sure what goes on in that bathroom -- but it involves going in and out of the room several times and running the bathtub at least twice --

and none of this involves washing hair

She is very clean -- I'm not complaining!

I finally said -- we're leaving in 15 minutes -- eat some breakfast and she started moving in light speed.

Finally out the door -- about 1/2 an hour later than I hoped we headed to the school for registration. In spite of taking to 100's of parents in the past few weeks they remembered us and helped us to fill out all the forms and gave us a class schedule

Miss M got all her classes! -- Although I know she was hoping for some sort of remedial math class instead of Algebra II -- and she spoke very clearly when she said "May I take Chemistry" when he offered her Physics

Good Girl

I hated physics too.

And shoot -- I can't count on Curt to come help with homework nightly!

She's also taking Dance, Art and Spanish

This should be a fun year

We headed next to the bank and were helped by a very nice man who explained all the options (which aren't very many for a minor)

We shopped for a phone -- but Miss M wanted to check with a friend to see what sort of phone she got -- We'll go back in a day or two to take care of the phone issue

Then -- we had to tackle the shorts issue

Miss M's shorts are Waaaay too short

Waaay

I mean

damn.

So we called my friend Amy at lunch (my fashion consultant) who told me we should go to the Gap and Old Navy

off to the Town Square Mall

It's great to be with someone who wants to take a picture of everything -- it's all a huge adventure

too bad it's 102 degrees outside -- OK I'm sure I exaggerate -- but it's really really hot

At least 97

It hits you like a hot wet blanket whacking you in the face everytime you get out of the car.

You would think you could buy a pair of shorts here in August

Fall Clothes

seriously?

Fall?

It's AUGUST

and we live on the surface of the sun.

We finally got one pair of shorts that she can wear to school and a very cute pair of jeans --

BTW -- my impression that Miss M would never express a personal opinion was completely flawed

She is MOST DEFINITE when she doesn't like something -- I showed her a pair of dark green cargo shorts and was told she didn't like them -- very clearly

picky

(OMG -- It's 15!)

She's a 00 to a 0 --and we had a little spat because she tried on some jeans that were 00 and she said they were too small -- so I got a pair of 0's to try on -- she came out -- they were cute -- and we took them up to the counter

When we got there I saw that she picked up the 00's

So we had our first -- "Yes they are the ones", "No, they're not the ones" argument

I made her go try them on again

She ended up with the 00's

I'm proud that I gave her our first eye-rolling moment

Mission accomplished -- just like a real MOM!!

Tour of the school tonight at 6 -- 1 hour from now -- I guess I better give her the 1 hour warning!

Orientation

We went to the orientation tonight and met about 8 students and their families.

It was fun
interesting
weird
and very very comforting

Things other people have in common with me

At least 1/2 of them are first timers
3 were also single
Most were my age
Several of them live very close

I think I've been thinking about this day as an opportunity for Miss M to build her community -- but I'm an idiot

I didn't think about building my own community!

When we got there I felt for her
She seemed awkward
She struggled to find a way to break into conversation

Which could have been a description of me.

Shit -- am I ever going to stop struggling with my social shyness?

There were some awkward false starts -- but thanks to a silly mixer game -- we all got the chance to talk to each other (clever coordinators!)

We bonded over foul burgers and dogs and insufficient side dishes.

I found myself feeling grateful that I didn't get that German kid that seems already bored with the universe -- but charmed by several of the students and most of the parents.

We'll be seeing a lot of each other -- monthly outings with the kids -- and I think Miss M's made a friend with a girl who lives nearby

Hell -- I might even be able to still have a social life -- there's a chance of some sleepovers

Woot!

I'm home now -- tired -- but upbeat as I look out over the coming months --

Tomorrow -- the school......

Day 1 - the great adventure begins

Yesterday Miss M feel asleep shortly after lunch

Exhausted.

I decided that the best plan was to let her sleep for 5 hours or so -- make her wake up and eat/go to the bathroom and stay up for a few hours and then go back to bed

I tried to wake her up at about 5pm

I knocked on the door

Nothing

So I went in and said her name

again -- no reaction

I touched her arm

nada

I shook her a big

Not a chance

I left her in there for another hour or so before I tried again

She finally woke up and looked at me with disbelief that I would wake her

I made her a deal -- she needed to eat then she could go back to bed.

She force-fed herself some chicken -- I think because I offered to let her sleep if she ate

I offered a movie after dinner -- she said "no"

we settled on -- stay awake long enough to unpack and then you can go to bed.

She ended up sleeping about 15 hours of her first 24 hours -- seems to have done the trick.

She learned a new word in English -- Jetlag.

Today we have orientation for the students -- it's a pool party and exchange student orientation -- I imagine it's a combination of "don't-break-the-rules-or-you'll-go-back-home" and "don't-let-your-host-parents-touch-you"

We'll see.

We made brownies together and went to Target -- I gave her a gift card to use for her school supplies -- she doesn't understand how credit cards or gift cards work -- another challenge

She has presented me with a number of lovely gifts -- and is wonderful about helping with the dishes.


We had a fun moment this morning when she asked how to make the water come out of the shower head.

I think this blog will be filled with the little moments

There was a part of me that really didn't believe that she would come to live here -- that wondered if it would happen even as I was waiting at the airport.

And it's just wonderful

everyone should do this

at least once

NOT an American girl

Miss M arrived today -- I had a moment of panic at the airport. There was a huge mission group coming home from Peru and their welcoming team kept getting in front of me and I was worried that Miss M would not see my sign.

I kept fighting to get to the front

the missionaries and the other passengers came through

but not Miss M

I must have looked sad with my orange sign

'maybe she stopped in the bathroom?'
'or fell asleep on the plane'

Finally -- from the other direction -- I see someone come my way -- I hold up my Orange welcome sign hopefully

She nods

Hooray!

She looks like she's about to drop -- poor thing

We find her bags and make our way home through awful traffic

She admits she has not eaten since Los Angeles -- but wants to eat at home instead of on the road.

Los Angeles -- let's see -- that's at least 15 hours ago

She perked up at the idea of a ham sandwich when we got in and ate twice as much as I thought

But she's definitely NOT an American kid -- she broke a tiny piece of the chips and tasted it -- this was what was left of her lunch:



We're on a great adventure!

Pleased

I'm really very very pleased with our progress in putting together Miss M's room

It's totallly adorable -- hopefully the pink won't gag her too much.

Crying

So

I can't stand it when people cry(even on TV)

I have to cry with them

which completely ruins my tough bitch image

damn

Comments on the rules

Well -- THAT was interesting.

The FB comments were fun -- except for the ass-clown who implied that he would like to get her on the web cam -- yeah -- it was a joke -- but it crossed a line -- afterall -- Miss M is a FB friend!!!!

Several people felt that there were 'too many rules' -- which felt weird to me at first....but then I thought....How doesn't your 15 yr old know that you have to put the shower curtain in the tub? -- You yelled at him for it when he was 9!

I'm going to stick to the longer list -- amend it with Sam's suggetions (Thank you Sam) that I make clear that curfew exceptions are requested and approved IN ADVANCE.
Sam also thought that the Internet restriction was too restrictive -- so I will reconsider.

Miss M prep is soldiering on-- I no longer feel ovewhelmed -- just tired --

I wish I had a Fairy Godmother.

Draft of the Rules

The exchange student guidebook encourages you to write out all the rule to make them easy for your student --otherwise all he students hear from you in the first week is "No, no, no"

Here's my draft (and including some examples from the guidebook)

Household rules:

1. Learn your new address and phone number right away -- keep a copy of it in your wallet.
2. I am your parent while you are here -- we're a family.
3. Everyone has chores to be done every day
4. We should always be polite and say "Please", "Thank you", "I'm sorry"
5. If you ever have a concern or worry -- if you're feeling sad or lonely -- please come talk to me - that's what families do.
6. Do not use appliances until you have been shown how to use them
7. Do not leave the stove or oven on after use. Do not leave the on when you are not home
8. Do not adjust the heat or air conditioner more than 3 degrees up or down.
9. If something breaks or doesn't work. Come tell me. I won't be mad

Daily Rules
1. Keep your room neat each day. Make your bed each day.
2. Make sure that your bathroom stays tidy
3. Do not leave food or dishes in your room. Put dishes in the dishwasher.
4. Clean up after yourself if you make food or work on a project
5. Turn out the lights when you leave a room
6. Do not burn candles if you are not in the room or if you are sleeping
7. Help with the laundry each week
8. Empty the dishwasher each day when you get home from school
9. Take the trash out on trash days (Monday and Thursday)
10. Help clean up after meals
11. Keep a list of things you need on the refrigerator
12. Mark important dates on the family calendar

Internet Use
1. Limit your use of the Internet to one hour a day unless schoolwork requires that you do more.
2. Do not give out personal information on the Internet - including your address. People are not always who they claim to be online
3. Do not use your web camera to talk to anyone other than your family at home unless approved by your host-mom
4. Do not access the family computer without permission. If using the family computer do not download files.

Financial/Money
1. Keep track of your own money. Let me know if you need help creating a budget. I will help you. You should contact your family back home if you need more money.
2. Let me know in advance (when possible) that you need something and I will take you to the store.
3. You are responsible for getting rides to extracurricular activities -- but if you cannot, I will try to take you there.
4. You are responsible for your school expenses, lunches bought at school, entertainment expenses and phone calls.

Making Plans
1. Your curfew on weeknights is 9pm. On non-school nights it is 11pm. If you are not going to be on time or if you need to request an exception to the curfew you must let me know.
2. School work must take a priority over your social life. You must finish your homework before going out with friends.
3. Always let me know where you are going, how you are getting there, who you are with and when you will be home. I always want you to be safe.
4. If you stay up late, please keep the TV/music volume down or use headphones.

SAFETY
1. Always keep the doors and windows locked when you are home. If I am not home, do not lock the deadbolt.
2. Do not accept rides or go places with strangers
3. Do not open the door to strangers. Use the peep hole and ask "who is it" before opening the door.
4. Do not ride in a car with someone who is unsafe or has been drinking alcohol. You can ALWAYS call me for a ride - anytime.
5. You can call me anytime -- 24 hours a day

Dating
1. No boys are allowed in the house or in your room without permission.
2 No more than one date per week
3. You may not date boys who do not go to your school or who are over 18.
4. I will want to meet any boy you go on a date with

Communication

1. Get a phone as soon as possible after you get here. You are responsible to pay for your own phone.
2. Call/Email or text me when you get home from school
3. Contact me if your plan change when you are out with friends
4. Do not make long distance calls from the home phone
5. Follow the CHI guideline for communicating with your family at home

Pool
1. Tell me when you are going to the pool and contact me when you come back
2. Rinse out wet bathing suits and hang in your shower to dry.
3. Use a pool towel instead of a bath towel at the pool

School
1. Take the bus to and from school each day. Call me if you miss your bus
2. Set aside time for homework each day. Ideally homework should be done before dinner
3. I am always happy to review your homework with you

General House Rules
1 Keep the plastic shower curtain inside the tub to keep the floor dry.
2. Hang your towels up after use. Towels are usually washed once a week, but if they need it we will wash them more.
3. If you have foods you like (or dislike) please say so -- we can buy different foods that we both like
4. Rinse and put your dishes in the dishwasher
5. Sharp knives and pots and pans are washed by hand
6. Do not stick your hand in the garbage disposal. Do not put meat, bones or celery in the garbage disposal. Be careful not to drop silverware or knives in the garbage disposal. Run water and keep your hands away when the garbage disposal is running

Ok -- what am I forgetting????

To Do List

Ok -- my to do list for getting ready for my vistor

in no particular order

1. Get a key made
2. Update insurance (done!)
3. clean out guest closet and find a new home for sample sale stuff
4. Get rid of sample sale stuff I'll never use (any takers?)
5. Buy another set of sheets
6. Get a desk
7. Buy a bookcase and assemble bookcase
8. Hang pictures in Miss M's room
9. Clean out pantry
10. Renew lease
11. Set up auto-payment for rent
12. Meet with Maid service
13. Set up carpet cleaning appointment
14. Sweep patio
15. Move carpet from guest room to dining room
16. Find bean bag or casual chair for guest room (optional)
17. Type house rules
18. Attend orientation
19. Contact school counselor
20. Enroll Miss M in school
21. Find local doctor
22. Make girl doctor appointment
23. Set up mail order RX
24. clean house
25. Send Miss M photo of her room
26. Sleep

ok -- so I had hoped that this would make me feel more in control

nope

T minus 23

So the divine Miss M will be here in 23 days --

and I realize how much junk I've gathered in the last year

time to clean out!

Anyone want a huge stash of scrapbooking crap I'm never going to use???

Rules

Apparently I'm supposed to create a list of house rules for my exchange student. They have pointed out that there are many exectations made of an american teen that are unspoken -- and it's better to write down the rules to create an environment thatis more comfortable for us both

Of course -- that means I have to figure out what those rules are

and that would be easier if I knew what sort of rules a normal teen has....

a little adventure

A few weeks ago was approached by someone about hosting an exchange student.

and I thought

why not?

I have the room

I have the time

I have the resources

why woudn't I want to do this?

There will be some sacrifices -- there will be some things that I'll miss out on

but I expect there will be many happy memories too.

They came to check out the apartment today -- I have a ton of work to do to get her room ready - but it's pretty exciting work to do -- but Amy (the rep from the agency) says that the rooms are almost always filled with boxes when they see them (whew!)

So we'll see how it goes

I need to work on 'house rules' apparently. Amy says it's easier to have things written down as it makes it easier for the student to understand the expectations....that way they don't have to worry about making mistakes all the time.

interesting days ahead

I can't wait.

Suspicious

sometimes my suspicious nature means I don't do somethings I want to...

Massage Envy today

they're offering one (hour long) massage per month at $49/month-- but you have to commit to 12 months.....and if I join right now during my first visit -- they'll waive my membership fee of $39.00

The membership fee

It just pisses me off

what are they doing in return for the membership fee -- refreshments for the meetings???? - No -- nothing.

just a way to pressure me to make a decision on the spot to save $39 that I wouldn't be spending anyway

All so I can save $20/massage -- (but not really) --without the massage I might get 6/year (or $414) -- but they'll give me 12 (6 of which I don't need and or won't have time to get) for $588.

and I can't cancel it before 12 months

I know I was squinting at her suspiciously before I declined to be ripped off.

Membership fee-- of all the nerve!

Eye Doctor

I go to the cutest eye doctor

If I leaned that direction that is-- she's adorable -- and just the right size to pop in your pocket.

I actually enjoy the whole experience -- I imagine because as a kid Dr. Engeberg was always so cool. During college (when I didn't wear glasses) he would see me walking down the street and would sometimes drag me in for a free glaucoma test (runs in the family)

He made a ton of money off the rest of the family -- so he gave me a free exam here and there -- perhaps because he knew it was inevitable that I would eventually be a patient.

Anyway -- back to Dr Adorable

I love the whole thing.

I love the test where you look at the square and hit the button every time you see a flash -- SURE we're checking for macular degeneration -- but it FEELS like a video game.

I love being able to tell her if number 1 or number 2 is clearer -- she seems pleased --as if I'm giving her the right answer and should be proud.

and I love it when I find out that the blurry number 1 is my current Rx - and clear number 2 is how I will NOW see the world.

Now -- it's the waiting game -- HURRY new glasses -- HURRY!

Stage 4 = despair

It's arrived - despair -- the point at which you think you've ruined it.

Which means I'm just 3 or 4 more trips to despair before we can declare this painting complete.

it'll be ok -- but for now -- yech

Stage 3

Not quite sure where it's headed

but I haven't reached the I hate it stage yet today

but the day is young

stage 2

I've never worked on anything this large

I need to think bigger

or smaller

huh

Drip and Splatter

Ok -- it was time to wipe out that disaster that I started a few weeks ago -- so I've started over

I wanted to play with the drip technique that I saw at the National Art Museum -- and it didn't go well (I think I need to research the method more first) -- so this is my reboot

and no -- it's not what it'll look like

But sometimes you just have to get a fresh start

tidbit

So I've just noticed that a few stuffed decorative bunnies from Easter that I have yet to store away after Easter have been sitting in a rather provocative position together for a few weeks now.

Makes you wonder what happens here all day while I'm gone.

And another message from Lover Boy

The temptation to say "Leave me alone!" -- really is strong.

or to forget how long he pestered me and just respond to what seems a reasonable request to communicate

I have to be willing to just keep up the silent treatment

any kind of attention at all will bring him back

full force

seriously

what a pain in the ass.

Lover Boy is Back

Deep sigh.

I love the Cottonwood Art Festival. It's usually the first weekend in May -- and it rains every frickin time.

every time.

But I just love it.

I love to walk around on the damp trampled grass and be inspired by the work of others. If you've never been -- it's in Richardson May 1 -- bring an umbrella.

Last year I had been talking to a guy who later became known as 'lover boy' and I send him a text that I was at the Festival -- he said he was a few blocks away and we met for the first time at Cottonwood.

It was a really nice first date

Who am I fooling.

It was the best first date of all time.

We held hands and strolled through the park -- we talked about art -- we laughed -- we eventually went to sit on the swings

It started to rain harder and he started to walk me to my car -- we had to run to escape the downpour.

We were both soaked

and we shared a romantic kiss in the pouring rain -- oblivious to the rain around us and other people scurrying to their cars

a great date

Yeaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

so -- nice guy

but his life was a complete disaster.

no thanks

I've done the disaster-thing -- there's nothing for me like a man who has his shit-together.

So -- I broke things off.

and he hung on

and on

there were endless phone calls --

followed by too many attempts to make it work.

I thought I had shaken him loose.

I mentioned the perfect date in passing to my friend Amy on Sunday

seriously -- is there a bug?

After 6 months -- another contact from him.

gaaaaahhhhh!

No offense Loverboy -- I'm not all that great of a catch -- MOVE ON!

I see things

faint motion

just

out

of

the

corner of my eye

a ghost?

a shade of some past scene

he lingers

craving oompletion of some unfinshed task

or maybe

Bob's relatives

have come for mousey revenge

or

maybe it's time for bed

All Roads lead to Nascar

I wrote this to someone today -- and it struck me as some of the sadest words in the English language.

Yeah -- in my case this weekend -- living right on top of Texas Motor Speedway -- they change the direction on the local roads so that almost every lane takes traffic TO the Nascar races -- and later when they are over -- away from Nascar.

But it makes me wonder

Is it more prophetic than that?

Seems to me that the Nascarization of America is upon us

(shudder)

Hate that I can't blog about work

It really was a mistake to make this such a public blog

There are time when I really want to vent about something at work -- and there's just no way to do it.

Hindsight.

so instead

I'm going to just type out what I wanted to say

and hit delete

over and over again

stimulating isn't it.

Let's just say that if everyone at work would just do everything exactly my way 100 % of the time -- we would all be happier

Back to Painting

The garage has been transformed -- and I'm knee deep in a project -- it's looking terrible -- but that's part of the fun of abstact

art only it's mother could love

I'm taking photos as I go

but for now

I'm going to keep them to myself

Just terribly

terribly

pleased

Is any one out there?

Do you hear that?

me neither

it was the icemaker

and it stopped making the tocking noise all on its own

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

now

if any one is out there reading this -- please please please leave me a comment.

It's pretty much just this one guy who keeps posting in Chinese.

and he's started to insult me

in Chinese

(it's a little hurtful)

say hello and cheer me up.

tock tock tock tock tock

My refrigerator is making the strangest sound

it's a tocking sound

not a TICKING -- very definitely a tocking

I open the door

I shut the door

I shift things around in the freezer

I push my ear against it's surface -- like a safe-cracker -- searching for the answer

I found myself standing in front of it today - screwdriver in hand and a murderous gleam in my eye

tock

tock tock

tock tock tock tock

tock tock tock

tock

tock-- you mock me

I fear that no on can hear it but me

The Wet Lady

In the mid-90's, I was living north of NYC and was looking for a job in the city.

The spouse (before he became the ex) worked in the city and we could commute in together -- 13 minutes to the station and an hour and 45 min on the train -- cake right?

I got a call from a high tech company looking for an office manager -- perfect for me!

Now it's important to know that I'm not from New York -- and I'm not from a city of any kind. I grew up in the mountains in Colorado -- and back in my day you could walk anywhere in town and never locked your door.

I got married and we moved to New York and this was one of my first opportunities to interview in the City. I drove to the station -- found a parking spot and caught the train into the city -- I was perfectly ready for my interview. Clean copies of my resume, plenty of time to find my way, umbrella (30% chance of rain) , new shoes and a great suit -- I settled in with my book until the train arrived.

I had a plan.

Car to the station,
train to Grand Central,
Walk 3 blocks to the subway,
Subway to Columbus Circle
and East about 7 blocks to the interview
(OK -- don't correct me if you're from the city -- it's been 17 years and you'll see my plan was flawed)

It was pouring rain in the city -- Now a smart girl would have sprung for a cab -- but we weren't in the cab-taking class back in the day.

I stepped out of Grand Central, sidestepped the cab stand and opened my umbrella to make the 3 block trek to the subway.

So Colorado girls don't know too much about wind currents and sky-scrapers, but I got a quick lesson that day. Half a block to the station, a stiff rainy wind blew my umbrella inside out (Yeah -- that really can happen!) --- I begin to run, resume folder over my head to the station. Two blocks to go..... one.....half a block -- and I'm in! -- WhewI survey the damage....not to bad.....I'll make it.

I take the train and even find the right train to switch to get to Columbus Circle -- the lady on the phone said it was just a few blocks away when I called to confirm the appointment yesterday. I found a newspaper that I can hold over my head until I can find a deli or a store that's selling an umbrella.

Maybe they'll even have a bathroom where I can clean up

No delis
No stores
No umbrellas
.......just me and a cheap newspaper over my head.

Slowly getting soaked and dripping newsprint in spiral stream down my right arm.

As I hurry across the street, I catch my heel in a teeny little pothole and pow -- I hit the street. I hobble to the curb and huddle under an awning.

The damage?

One broken heel,
shredded hose,
and a little bit of blood dripping from my scraped knee.

I decide to keep on -- fight the good fight.

The building is just ahead.
I can go and explain and maybe they'll reschedule.

I really need this job.

So I arrive at the building -- which is under construction. The first floor is gutted and I'm shocked to hear from the crew that the building is completely empty.

EMPTY?!?!

I spot a pay-phone on the other side of the street and hobble over.

I find the damp card in my bag and call to find out where I've gone wrong.

"sfjlku Software may I help you?"

"Oh - Hi, I'm Gina, I had an interview at 2, but when I arrived at the address they told me that...."

"Uh -- are you the really wet lady on the pay-phone?"

crap

"Come on up -- we're on the 4th floor"

So I hobble up.
Wet hair hanging in strings,
shredded hose,
newsprint streaked arm,
broken heel,
damp resume.

Not only do they interview me.

They take me a on a tour of their office and introduce me to the entire staff

One week later I got a call back for a second interview

(whaaaa?????)

When I came in, I asked him why they called me back in after the disastrous first time. He smiled and said -- "Yeah -- worst interview ever. But you were such a good sport we thought you deserved a second chance."

Best job I ever had.

OK -- No -- didn't get the job, didn't get a thanks-but-no-thanks letter -- but did get an awesome job for another company....but THAT's another story.

Zero Water Pitcher

ok

I think I've fallen to a new low

big excitement of the day?

I found a zerowater pitcher at Bed Bath and Beyond --

My parents are using it and it comes with this really cool meter that tells you how pure (or not pure) your water is. The higher the number -- the more your water tastes like -- well "not-water"

My tap water -- which tastes a little metalic -- scored a 168

bottled water -- 20

and I'm about to go test the now purified water

and it scored a 1

not quite a 0 -- but it is the first batch through the pitcher

I think we have a winner.

woo hoo!

I

really

really

really

need more excitement

it scored a 1 on the meter

Surprise Nachos

I decided that today would be a good day to do surprise nachos at work.

Last Halloween I bought all the stuff for a Fajita dinner including nacho cheese sauce. I bought 5 cans of sauce -- and didn't realize until I went to open it that it was concentrated -- you add 54 oz of water to each can

Leaving me with 3 cans left over for some future event

today

So I picked up the chips got out the warming trays and started mixing this orange foul cheese crap with sour cream and rotel and tons and tons of hot water to transform it into cheese lava (blech)

The associates loved it.

I decided to have about 1 tablespoon (I kid you not) of sauce over some chips.

have I mentioned my lactose intolerance?

seriously -- I don't think there's actually any sort of dairy product in the foul orange can of crap.

New meaning to the phrase 'surprise nachos'

color me miserable.

A big pile of awesomeness

Fun for the day:

• I get to eat crow and apologize tomorrow (at 4am) for someone else's bad judgement
• Got a bloody nose in the car
• I've been un-friended by someone I didn't really want to be friended by in the first place - stings a little -- like Jr. High
• was fooling around with a pair of scissors and punctured a hole in my water bottle shooting a spray of water across the desk (while on a conference call)
• lost my birth control pills

And it's only Tuesday

Danish Women's Curling Team

Really?

Skirts?

While Curling?

is that really necessary?

I understand that sex sells -- but this is a little low.

skirts

ridiculous

Laundry

I just have too many clothes.

even though I never have anything to wear.

My problem with laundry is that I hate it so much that I have a tendancy to do just enough laundry so that I have clothes for the week -- this usually consists of: A load of whites and the sheets and a load of darks.

I tend to put off towels -- sweaters -- blankets -- off season clothing forever.

and I almost never go through and throw out things that don't fit -- so they end up staying in the laundry bin -- not cleaned -- and not given to good-will.

It's out of control.

I pulled every bit of it out and put it on the bedroom floor -- I'm committed to stick to doing laundry this weekend until it's gone.

or until I get back to normal and shove it back in the laundry bin.

Why the Internet is bad

Screw you WebMD -- my nosebleed isn't a sign of pre-leukemia.

It's just a nosebleed.

Orange Cat

Dear Orange Cat living in the box on my porch,

I'm so sorry for scaring you so badly this morning -- I just wanted to pick up the bag of trash off the porch for the Monday pickup. BTW -- thanks for not tearing into it.

If it wouldn't be too much trouble -- could you avoid having a litter of kittens?

Sincerely,

Gina

A Musing

I've often said that people don't change
we are who we are -- and once we reach a certain age it's very dificult to change.

and yet -- I've seen someone kick a habit of a lifetime -- another person take very harsh feedback and turn herself around and another open himself up to risk.

Some of these changes might be fleeting

there may be backsliding or a full reversal.

But it's good to see that people can change themselves

if they want to

if they really really want to

My oubliette

So I'm going to sound like a show-off -- I wouldn't know what an oubliette is if it weren't for a wonderful little movie with David Bowie and Jennifer Connally called Labrynth.


An oubliette is a dungeon cell accessible only through a trap door in the ceiling. It's where you put things you want to forget.


Since I moved in -- my oubliette has been the 2nd bedroom. Wading through it is a little bit like that game I played with my brother where we have to navigate around the living room by climbing on the furniture -- if your foot touched the carpet it was burned off by lava.


oh


you didn't play that game?


that game's weird?


Look -- it snowed ALOT in Colorado -- we had to make up some weird games or end up like Alfred E. Packard -- or worse -- his travel companions.


Anyway.


When I moved in I told the movers to put all the boxes in the 2nd bedroom -- with the thought that I would pull the boxes out and unpack each one instead of having to trip over boxes for days and days.

A brilliant plan if I do say so myself.

Except that in reality -- I would just venture in to rummage through a box -- find something -- say -- the waffle iron -- leave a pile of crap on the floor and leave.

out of sight out of mind.

Then I started storing the empty boxes there.

and the packing materials

and the holiday decorations

Today -- I finally decided it was time to get the guest bed and found one on Craigs list.

I'm embarrassed to say that it only took about an hour to clear up most of the boxes -- although there is much left to do.

I'm sleeping in my guest bed -- and I don't have to be a contortionist to wade through to get to it.

Ladies and Gentlemen -- the oubliette is closed -- you don't have to go home -- but you can't stay here!